Poor
Sam’s mom was criticized by family members who feared that this kind of
behavior might turn him gay!! Wow, if
that were true! Maybe THEY should read
the article published in the journal Pediatrics about a study which found that “children
in lesbian homes scored higher than kids in straight families on some
psychological measures of self-esteem and confidence, did better academically
and were less likely to have behavioral problems, such as rule-breaking and
aggression. “
Read more: http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1994480,00.html#ixzz2EzVwGM3q
Read more: http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1994480,00.html#ixzz2EzVwGM3q
Judging from the picture, Sam appears to be carefree and
confident. He was quoted as saying, “Ninja’s
can wear pink shoes too!” Yes, he is
only 5 and five year olds do not understand they nuances of the adult world.
Five year olds don’t understand racism, bigotry, discrimination or gender specifics.
If they do, it’s only because they
learned it from the adults around them. Really, if you think about it, most 3 and 4 year old boys would love playing with dolls, strollers and the kitchen sets. But somehow the dads, and moms too, feel that
they need to be more manly and start overloading them with Ninja’s, dinosaurs,
race cars and such. Otherwise they might
become too soft!!
I don’t deny that men and women are inherently,
biologically and hormonally different.
In Sweden there was a movement at one school to do away with gender
specific toys and practice gender neutrality in the preschool. Instead of addressing the kids as “him” or “her,”
the teachers referred to the children as “friends",
by their first names, or as "hen" - a genderless pronoun borrowed
from Finnish. I guess that would
be like the English pronoun “it”?
Gender neutrality, as it equates to gender equality, is good. But to totally deny our gender differences is
wrong too. Being more gender neutral does not have to mean referring to
ourselves as IT’s. Gender neutrality is
also not an attack on our masculinity or femininity.
I have 2 boys and I see how different boys and girls can be. They play differently; they interact with each
other differently. But is it because
that is the way we have been programmed to believe for so long? Is it
because WE steer our boys and girls in a certain path…or towards certain toys
or colors…because of our expectations of what it means to be a man or a
women.
The focus on Sam and his shoes makes me ask, is pink
inherently a feminine color? In the early part of the 19th century, fashion magazines promoted pink as
the perfect color for men. Red was
considered a very strong, masculine color, and pink being derived from red, it
was only natural! Blue, on the other
hand, was considered cool and dainty. Go
figure!! Maybe 50 years from now, after
more incidences and debates instigated by the likes of Sam and my son, our
society will decree that pink is gender neutral!!